Citizen Fitness: 8 Easy Ways to Improve America, and Your Wellbeing, Right NOW

A guest post by Martha Engber

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This week, we wanted to feature a guest writer, Martha Engber, who has interviewed us about our book, Beyond the Politics of Contempt, for her blog and YouTube channel, Vigilant Positivity. Welcome, Martha!

Martha writes:

Besides being a writer, journalist and host of Vigilant Positivity, a blog and YouTube channel uniting Americans, I’m a long-time member of the fitness industry as a personal trainer and fitness instructor.

While the two may seem at opposite ends of the work spectrum, they actually involve the same key skill: excellent communication.

When conveying ideas, I aim for simplicity and positivity.

With that goal in mind, I offer you some simple, positive steps you can take today to help decrease polarization and increase your sense of wellbeing.

All of the points gleaned below can be found in Beyond the Politics of Contempt, by fellow Braver Angels members Doug Teschner, Beth Malow and Becky Robinson, a book I loved and reviewed.

Note that all of these suggestions apply to fitness, and I would argue, living an overall happier, healthier life.

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1. Assume that all of us are doing the best we can.

When we go the gym, or take our daily walks, we see others doing the same. Despite our differences in size, shape and disposition, we intuitively understand that we’re united by a common goal: we want to live longer, healthier lives. Sometimes we make mistakes, but in general, we’re trying hard not to.

The same is true regarding our civic lives. Despite our political affiliations, we all want the same thing: for our families to be safe and to be given the chance to do better in life.

When we adopt that positive attitude of we’re all in this together, our bodies respond positively, which leads to a sense of wellbeing. Positivity kicks up the production and circulation of dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin and endorphins, all of which make us feel better, as in:

• we sleep better

• we think better (improved memory and problem solving)

• we have the capacity to trust, empathize and bond with others

• we enjoy a natural pain reliever that helps decrease stress and discomfort

So be inclusive, rather than suspicious, and compassionate rather than unmerciful. And remember that while you can’t control others’ reactions, you can control your own.

2. Learn to identify negative messaging.

If we go to a fitness class and the instructor tells us we’re weak and not working hard enough, some of us will have the confidence to leave. But others will stay, thinking such negativity will make us strong.

Wrong!

Negative messaging has no other purpose than to make us feel bad about ourselves and others, and is specifically designed to incite rage and fear, strong emotions that flood our system with adrenaline and cortisol. That leads to:

• anxiety

• high blood pressure

• headaches

• insomnia

• depression

3. Learn who’s sending out those negative messages and why.

Negative messaging has been used for centuries by anyone who wants to gain money and power and uses manipulation to achieve those goals.

In the fitness industry, they’re companies that tell us without their products we won’t be beautiful, accepted or loved. Think supplements, fancy gym clothes and exotic health treatments.

In society, those who create negative messengers are conflict entrepreneurs :

• politicians

• political parties

• hostile foreign nations

• corporate bigwigs

• political pundits

• a lot of the media

They spend billions every year to flood our inboxes and social media feeds with messages that warn us not to trust the “other side.”

They give us code words and phrases we can use to identify one another as compatriots and others as “the enemy.”

They create clever, but highly derogatory nicknames for people and groups, then pat us on the back when we repeat those insulting terms.

They do all of this because they know the easiest way to achieve their goals is to keep us rattled.

In such a state, we don’t think well and we can’t see what they’re actually doing.

4. Reject negative messaging.

When we learn something that’s distressing, our immediate urge is to spread the word.

In fitness, when we read that some substance we’ve been ingesting for decades, like white flour, is all of a sudden not good for us, we want to share a link or otherwise warn others.

The same is true in society. When we learn, hear or see something on social media or our preferred news outlets that upsets us, we want to spread the word.

Resist the urge!

If the claim causes us to feel angry or scared, we can safely identify the message as the product of conflict entrepreneurs. By refraining from commenting on or sharing the information, we help stop their lies. Encourage your friends and family to do the same.

5. Educate others.

When we try a new fitness activity like pickleball, swimming lessons or a triathlon, we often arrive feeling vulnerable and confused. We’re so grateful when more experienced people welcome us and show us the ropes.

We can embody that same attitude by reaching out to others who are new to depolarization and the Common Ground Movement. Besides sharing our experiences, we can teach them the terms:

• conflict entrepreneurs

• negative messaging

• perception gap : when our perception of those on the “other side” is greatly out of whack

• common ground: how much common ground we Americans share

6. Continue to be politically active, but change how we do it.

If we feel strongly that our favorite sporting events need some kind of change in the rules or leadership, calling people names or making threats gains no headway. Instead, the best path is to start, or join, an organization aimed at making the change.

The same goes for political action like protests, letter-writing campaigns and consumer boycotts:

DO stand up for what you think is right

DO state what you want

DO take legal, nonviolent action

DON’T use negative messaging, i.e., insulting nicknames, slogans, images

7. Stump for Common Ground organizations like Braver Angels, More Like US and BridgeUSA.

When we love our local gyms, sports clubs or fitness groups, we tend to enthusiastically talk about our experiences with the goal of getting our friends to join.

Consider using that same strategy to recruit friends and family to depolarization and positive change. Join one of the hundreds of organizations working to educate and unite Americans. Then promote those efforts, just as I’m doing here as a Braver Angels member and advocate for Beyond the Politics of Contempt,

If you don’t know where to find these organizations, check out the Braver Angels Braver Network.

8. Practice!

There’s no way we get good at anything without regular practice. Choose one thing from the above and put it on tomorrow’s to-do list. Then repeat until the behavior becomes a daily habit.

I’m truly interested in knowing what tasks you end up choosing, if anything. And if you don’t find anything manageable, I invite you to share the obstacles you faced. By trading information, we can together find solutions that smooth the way toward depolarization, unification and better wellbeing.